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Youth: not wasted on the young, let's hope

By Michael J. Smith on Monday October 25, 2010 06:28 PM

(Note: the image above is no longer an embedded video, for reasons which may become more clear if you read the first few comments. Click on it, though, and you'll see what set this off.)

I like it when she tells me I'm cute. Of course I know it's a lie, since this is a Democratic Party ad, but still, it's nice to hear -- until one realizes that as with all Democratic Party lies, the inversion law which must be applied suggests something very dire about my cuteness.

"Morning Boehner" is, of course, delightful. Credit where it's due.

The personalization is also rather nifty, though if you're not logged on to Facebook they shamefacedly have to ask your name. I originally replied that I was Joseph Stalin, which is what I usually do with these things, and that produced some unintended comedy. The protestor's sign, for example, took on a very enigmatic character.

This is of course the work of MoveOn, hoping to jolly young guys into trooping out for their local Dembot dead sheep. Since I firmly believe that the kids are all right, I don't think it's going to work.

But then... she's a little scrawny, isn't she? No doubt MoveOn did some market research and discovered that tippable 18-to-25 dudes responded well to her meager charms. This is not a good sign, unless the pool of young male tippables is negligibly tiny and psychologically atypical, which doesn't actually seem too unlikely.

Comments (40)

op:

how do u shut this fucking thing off !!!!

Emma:

Mouseover, pause.

She has pretty eyes, but I have an urge to wash my laundry on her chest.

Why is this campaign so passionate-looking? Democrats haven't passed any liberal legislation since Lyndon Johnson was in charge. Are they just so terribly opposed to taking 'consulting' jobs for the next few years? Poor guys.

MJS:

Yes, it's rather rude, isn't it? There's a "pause" button down in the lower left, if you use the scroll things on the window. But then it restarts when you go to comments. Sigh. I may have to take it off the page, since it plays without user action. Maybe there's a less intrusive YouTube version.

But Owen -- do I remember correctly from our long-bygone college days that you envisioned, with some glee, a future in which flying robots would zoom in through your fortieth-story window and force you to buy a hamburger? Admittedly, there's a lot more to be said for a hamburger than for the Democratic Party, so your vision wasn't nearly dystopian enough.

MJS:

PS -- turns out if you just click on it, it shuts up. But still, it really is a public nuisance, isn't it?

MJS:

In fact, its very rudeness tells us something important. Vendor-provided embed code on videos doesn't usually auto-start the vid without a user action, but this is sooo important and sooo entitled that it can dispense with the usual niceties. Maybe I'll leave it up on the page for a while, by way of an object lesson in just what pricks the Democrats are.

Sean:

In the not too distant future, food will be available by prescription only, and will be laced with amphetamines.

Thanks for the warning!

gluelicker:

Damn, until five minutes ago just seeing/hearing the name "Olivia" was enough to get me drooling in anticipation of HOTTTness. (It has nothing to do with the lady who sang "Physical." It has to do with a Hong Kongese girl in the library, who wore a colorful Swatch... oh, never mind.) Now... ruined. I'll forever associate the name with fright wigs and compulsory flying hamburgers. (That's a cool idea, though, like the Jetsons on bad acid.)

gluelicker:

In fact, its very rudeness tells us something important

What it's telling me is "why did Michael Smith doom us all?" You asshole! I hate you! Give me back my future!

gluelicker:

Strange, though, the techno-"futurism" in this clip -- grainy TV transmission, blah blah -- seems to come straight out of the Max Headroom era. Are we trying to elect Fritz Mondale? Then again, his corpse did run for Wellstone's seat back in '02. And omigod -- "Where's the beef?" That infernal Hamburger Connexion again!

gluelicker:

Democrats haven't passed any liberal legislation since Lyndon Johnson was in charge

What are you, deef? Haven't you heard of a plucky gal named Lilly Ledbetter? Now get out there and vote, jerkoff!

gluelicker:

Democrats haven't passed any liberal legislation since Lyndon Johnson was in charge

What are you, deef? Haven't you heard of a plucky gal named Lilly Ledbetter? Now get out there and vote, jerkoff!

gluelicker:

Sorry, what a klutz. Pls delete both of the double posts... it's all fun and games until someone takes HTML liberties

Dr House:

That actresses uncle is a fairly well-known climate change denier.

Wilde was born in New York City on March 10, 1984. Her mother, Leslie Cockburn (née Redlich), is a 60 Minutes producer and journalist, and her London-born father, Andrew Cockburn, is an Irish journalist, as are her paternal uncles Alexander Cockburn and Patrick Cockburn, all of whom are contributors to the political website CounterPunch.org.

gluelicker:

2010 WAS THE FATEFUL YEAR IN WHICH WE TOOK THE IRREVERSIBLE TURN TOWARD BULIMIA

(teletype style)

Podolinsky:

Haven't you heard of a plucky gal named Lilly Ledbetter?

And the V-chip... don't forget the V-chip.

Sean:

"In 2009 Wilde was ranked #1 on Maxim magazine's Hot 100."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olivia_Wilde

A rousing appeal to the lad-mag demographic.

gluelicker:

"In 2009 Wilde was ranked #1 on Maxim magazine's Hot 100."

CORRECTION: 2009 WAS THE FATEFUL YEAR IN WHICH WE TOOK THE IRREVERSIBLE TURN TOWARD BULIMIA

(teletype style)

Valechka Humbert:

Forget about her, she's married, apparently to a Nabakov character:

She married Italian-American documentary filmmaker flamenco guitar player, and son of an Italian prince Tao Ruspoli on June 7, 2003, in Washington, Virginia on a school bus with only a pair of witnesses. They currently live and work in Venice, Los Angeles, California.

hnming:

She's Andrew Cockburn's little girl, and her uncles regularly feature on Counterpunch. You can't go wrong much with that family.

Who the hell is Michael Smith?

gluelicker:

Who the hell is Michael Smith?

Whoever he is, he is an asshole. I hate him. He stole my future.

stillnotking:

Don't you philistines watch House? She plays Dr. Remy "Thirteen" Hadley. It's pretty much her only big role.

hapa:

in the split-decision congress future, children are named after health insurance companies and banks, which is better. classier.

FB:

I think that they're going after the gamer vote with this one. It fits nicely into the "Space marine, this is the last transmission from Forward Base Alpha" genre of video game interludes.

I doubt that there is much to worry about in terms of GOTV potential here, given that Star Craft 2 just came out. It's hard to imagine the space commander crew calling off their zerg rushes to go vote.

op:

the wiki on this teal eyed
table chested
starving seal act
reads quite unconscionably noxious
on the paine0meter

paper doll cool
surging careeer
euro trash camerahead hubby

another first class cockburn show boat
pure girondin

btw in my future capacity
as commisar of female leg pairs
i'll allow father S
to take personal charge
of cuzz laura's post rev...career

http://p3books.com/files/2009/07/laura_flanders.jpg


errrr
t'is called per comrade beria

" revolutionary companion distribution "

op:

fb
this familiarity
with the latest string of game box goodies

suggests to yours truly here at least

you ain't masterbating enough

FB:

*sticky hand in the air* I've never actually played star craft. I did live with some Koreans at one point though.

op:

"a Nabokov character"

what !!!!

why damn u for suggesting that

a figure
from the hand of ole VN ...indeed

talk about a brush with a demi god :

father smith ..at my insistence
pursued/chased/ importuned VN
straight out
of the coply square dunkin donuts
of a summers eve
in 1972

haulted with a stern bark
of
"mr nabakov... is that u sir ?"
Nab
looked around bewildered
disclaimed himself
and fled
cruller in hand
from we bearded urban motley
back across
the darkened square
to his hotel

Saxo:

You apparently have not been watching the recently terminated Sarah Connor Chronicles--no Wilde there, but the Brit Lena Headey (Queen Gorgo in 300).

MJS:

I had no idea she was Somebody -- I have a daughter who watches House religiously, but for some reason TV makes me fidgety.

And I certainly had no idea I was unknowingly dissing a Cockburn, for the second time in my life (the first time was in a piece that I sent off to Alex, and which he good-naturedly ran at Counterpunch, which had some fun with his cousin Laura Flanders). I admire the Cockburn family, white sheep and all.

But still. She is awfully scrawny. What is it with young guys and skinny girls?

miguel:

There is so much to hate about this ad:

It's preeningly self-conscious 'edginess'
The Bjork namecheck
The anorexic Angelina Jolie wannabe (shame on the Cockburns for spawning this irritating tool)
And most of all, the idiotic suggestion that any party or president could be more whorish and war-mongering than what we have now.

I fucking hate EVERYTHING about this ad. It makes me want to find whatever hipsterish ad tool came up with it and drive his ironically geekish designer glasses into his skull.

As Alex Cockburn would say, my hate is pure.

The greatest thing about this "creative stunt" is that it'll only work on the choir. Jesus, how pathetic.

op:

father in a blind taste test
i suspect you'd reject alex too with the flow of generations
the cockburn brand runs ever more
toward the old tall case clocks pendulum
tick ....tock
chic pink ....shocking pink
chic pink ....shocking pink

alex's hate may be pure
but its up there hissing away
on genteel stilts

any hard ball political wind storm
could blow him right over
and land him in a pre positioned
pool of opportunism ..
not that there's anything wrong
with opportunism
especially hot tub opportunism

strikes me as humanizing
the parlour serpent showing
he's just
another mammal of some sort after all...
or a bird perhaps

op:

"She is awfully scrawny"

that photgraphs well
but
one imagine louie mayer
cutting the air sideways
and saying with an imperial rasp

"not enough knock on her ...next !!"

So, in the "ruined" future, hackers are able to break into corporate television and make their messages appear by waving their hands?

Shit, that's huge, huge progress.

Peter Ward:

Just after posting this to facebook I discovered a facebook comrade--an anarchist no less--posted with apparently righteous indignation a video clip featuring a woman MoveOn activist being shoved on the ground, with a boot pressed against her head for trying to present Rand Paul with the "Republicorp Truth Award" (or something along those lines), obviously inspired by this video. My comrades comment that accompanied the clip, "a metaphor for what the Tea Partiers would do in power." And while the (mildly) violent action was cowardly and shameful, I couldn't help thinking of the obvious analogous metaphor for present Democrat policy: a MoveOn supporter drone-bombing one's house, maiming if not killing those inside. This anecdote provides an illustration of the magnitude of the deceit involved--the Tea Party is blamed for hypothetical actions which in fact are trivial in comparison to the violence, human suffering inflicted by the incumbent regime.

gluelicker:

It makes me want to find whatever hipsterish ad tool came up with it and drive his ironically geekish designer glasses into his skull.

That's a soothing image. I will rest more easily tonight. I'm sure you were happy to be of service.

Anonymous:

What is it with not so young guys and not so skinny girls?

http://www.bau.pt/weblog/botero-modelo.jpg

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on Monday October 25, 2010 06:28 PM.

The previous post in this blog was Assume the position, Mr Chips.

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